(L-R) Barron Trump, Melania Trump, Donald Trump, and Sean Spicer (probably) (Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images)
If David Lynch directed a political thriller it would be less terrifying than Trump’s Easter celebration.
Being president is hard. There are countless problems where there are simply no good solutions. Foreign policy is a complicated spider web of impossible choices. Working with Congress is enough to make anyone turn to black tar heroin. But that’s not to say it’s all bad. There are some events when you’re president, where even when things are tough, you get automatic wins. One such event is the White House Easter Egg Roll. Even the worst of presidents can’t screw up taking pictures with a giant Easter bunny and a bunch of excited kids. Right? Right? Oh, no. Donald Trump found a way to screw it up, didn’t he?
Despite a flurry of reports that suggested the Egg Roll was in trouble, the administration got an event up and running. What could he do that’s so bad once the event actually started?
So he forgot to put his hand over his heart for the national anthem. Now is this a big deal? No. But when a president makes his entire platform about how he loves America, and America needs to be great and the former president wasn’t American, it’s a bad look. And more than that, it would have led Fox News for three weeks had it happened during the Obama years. But whatever. Not a great moment, but oh well. He then talked to kids! I bet it was cute!
Yeah. That’s Donald Trump putting on his authoritarian pants and bragging about his administration to a group of children while flanked by the Easter Bunny. I feel like I’m in a David Lynch political thriller, and I have to be honest, it terrifies me. Why take acid, when I could just watch this clip and get the same experience. What’s next? Threatening to deport families while hanging with Santa Clause? Declaring Nuclear War with his good friend the Tooth Fairy?
And if that wasn’t enough, then Trump was just a dick to some kid for no reason. This kid wanted his Make America Great Again hat signed, which, to be honest, makes this kid not super likable, but whatever. He’s a kid. When I was a kid, I loved Lou Bega. We all make mistakes. Anyway, kid wants Trump to sign his hat. Trump takes it and signs it and the kid is excited and polite…
THEN TRUMP THROWS HIS HAT INTO THE CROWD.
How hard is it to sign an autograph for someone and hand that item back to the person who handed it to you? If you can’t do that, how are we supposed to trust you with the complex nuances of diplomacy, especially in an age of unstable leaders with nucle—Oh right, we’re all screwed. Cool cool.